I know a man who has shown love.
He showed love in that quiet, committed way that asks not for applause or admiration, but is demonstrated in his daily life.
This kind of love has no reward. It needs no reward. It is a love borne out of care, commitment, and a deep, inner strength. His acts of love were simple but the kind that many people find hard to perform. Watching and waiting as the one you love suffers, deteriorates, slowly becomes a shadow of the strong person they once were. Being beside the one you love until the very end. Giving up your time, your career, the world you once knew, all to care for the one you love.
Yet, the ending of this kind of story is inevitably one of loss. When the end comes the loss felt is no less painful than if it were sudden, unexpected and out of the blue. The feeling of loss is palpable. The silence is deafening. The emptiness is suffocating.
Without the daily, quiet repeated routine, you are left piecing together a new version of life, finding a new path, finding a different way of living without your loved one. Gathering strength and looking at life from a new perspective takes courage and a recognition that the road will be long and not always the easiest of journeys.
There are people living this story every day of their lives – if you’d like to find out more, go to: http://www.carersuk.org
This post is dedicated to F.C (13/03/1924 – 11/12/2011)
And to his son and wife (T.C and H.C) who cared for him until the very end.